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Alright, I arrived at the rehearal hall to start setting up for the day, and I just clenched.  I have let this show get to me to the point where I am psychsomatically getting frustrated just by walking in the door.  So I am going to improve my mood by sharing with all of you the one joke that is guaranteed to make me laugh.  Now, this isn't a great joke.  If I'm in a really good mode I will maybe chuckle at this joke.  But if I am overtired, or hugely frustrated, or having an awful day, this joke makes me guffaw.  There are two parts.

Part I
Q:  Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?

A:  Because it was dead.


Part II
Q:  Why did the chicken fall out of the tree?

A:  Because it was stapled to the monkey!

*laughs hysterically*  I have spent an hour in a parking lot late at night after some show debating the attachment method in re: chicken to monkey.  Staples have always won (though if you're doing a lighting call safety chaining the chicken to the monkey is also acceptable).

I hope other people find this amusing.  Have a great weekend everyone who is getting one.

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That is just not cool about being psychosomatically affected by the rehearsal space. Here is my favorite clean joke:

Q: What do you get when you cross an insomniac, a dyslexic and an agnostic?
[Highlight below to see answer.]
A: Someone who lies awake at night wondering if there really is a Dog...

Heh I like that. Here's another one.
Q: What's green and sits in a corner?
A: A naughty frog.

Yeah, that is a good joke. I have heard a variation of it where there are two monkeys, but making the second one a chicken actually makes it better for me. Why would the chicken be up in the tree in the first place?

My theory is that the chicken and monkey have been living symbiotically stapled together for a long time. Mostly because picturing that makes me giggle even harder.

I'll have to keep that joke in mind for the next time my little LORT theatre company makes my neck twinge with stress and grr...

Perhaps the chicken could be gaff taped to the monkey? Or attached with tie line?

yeah, it's a great late-night punchy joke.

The attachment method is up to the teller, though both the gaff tape and tie line lose a certain amount of the shiny you get with staples. But really, you can tell the joke and just make it whatever you have in your hands at that moment.

right so _i_ thought that second part was pretty funny. what does that say about me?

i would have voted for duct-taping the chicken to the monkey.

The joke is always funny. It just doesn't always send me into ten minutes of can't stand up laughter, which is what has been happening lately.

The duct tape contigent is always strong, given that duct tape works on everything. But you have to be careful not to use too much or you would obscure the monkey/chicken and that would be no good.

true. and staples are always a safe way to go.

how about tie-line?

I can't use tie-line because my knot tying isn't so hot. But they could kind of be meshed together...

every so often, i really wish i had a spool of tie-line. sometimes, you have a situation where you really need it... like any time i have to coil any sort of cable...

Tie line is incredibly handy for many things. I keep wanting to get a spool and knit something with it - just to be strange.





I still laugh every time I hear it, but no one tells it as well as you and Wil. Egads, it makes me snort with laughter even when I'm well rested and in good spirits.

I'm sorry that your show is stressing you out. I should be back up more permanently soon.... maybe I can bring you lunch or tea or something and let you breathe.

Sorry, I must giggle again... I wonder why I find that joke so funny?

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